Saturday, January 29, 2011

Gratitude

This one time I got in a fight with my mom when I was 9 or so years old.

As punishment, she had me write 100 things I was grateful for in my journal.

Guess who wasn't on my list....

My oh my, how things have changed. I could easily sit down now and write 100 reasons why I am grateful for my momma alone!

Through this simple punishment, she had the opportunity to teach me one of her most valuable lessons: Actively recognize the tender mercies you receive from the Lord daily and WRITE THEM DOWN!!!

Heavenly Father isn't giving you those experiences just for yourself, you know ;)



I double dog dare you to keep a gratitude journal every day for a month.



Just do it... Nike style.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Taboo

So if you're reading this and you tend to blush easily...maybe you should stop.

I feel that in the Mormon culture especially, there are a million and a half taboo topics that everyone sweeps under the carpet in order to pretend like we all like making funeral potatoes and relief society center pieces and nothing else really matters.

Such topics include:
1. Why blacks couldn't have the priesthood for so long
2. If we have more than one heavenly mother
3. Homosexuality

I do not like sweeping.

Therefore, lets talk about sex.

Yep, I said it. Sex.

Sex. Sex. Sex. Sex. Are you getting uncomfortable yet?

Good :) neither am I.

Today I was standing in line at the bookstore to buy post-it notes. I turned around and it just so happened that the girl that was standing behind me was my old roommate's sister. I never got to know her super well last winter but I still tried to make small talk because I could tell she remembered me too. I noticed she was sporting a big fat rock on her finger so I said something about it. Turns out, she's been married for 6 months but only gets to see her husband once a month for a few days at a time because of his job.

(In my head I was thinking "Well that sucks, sex is finally legal but now you can't even have it!")

She must have read my thoughts because right after that she exuberantly informed me that I didn't have to worry.... because apparently they sext.

That's right. SEXT.

Like have sex. Only through texting. Sexting.


Just a thought: What if you replied to the wrong person on accident while sexting? Try explaining that to the girl in your class who only wanted to see when you could meet up for a group project.

Another thought: One word: blackmail.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Friday, January 21, 2011

Rising from the Grave

Here's the dealio.
I have nothing to do in Rexburg.

It turns out that once you have a boyfriend, all desire to be social vanishes into thin air.

*poof*

So now I spend my friday nights reading The Hunger Games (totally amazing and addicting by the way), painting my finger nails and reading quotes from Stephen Colbert.

Don't google him unless you want to be mildly offended.

There are the kinds of things he says:

"Since seniors can't read this, I can say whatever I want about them. They look like lizards."

"The biggest threat facing America today- next to socialized medicine, the Dyson vacuum cleaner, and the recumbent bicycle- is gay marriage. "

"Marriage is like the death penalty: One outcome, so many different ways of carrying it out."

"Ever have a nagging suspicion you're poor? I know my staff does."



Tuesday, January 11, 2011

A Testimony of Timing

Who's in the mood for a sappy love story?

Good. I thought so.

*names have been changed to protect the innocent
Once upon a time there was a princess named Eliza. It was her junior year of college and she felt like her life was growing a bit stale. She hadn't dated much since her best friend missionary boy had left 16 months prior to September. She had made goals for herself and had tried to pick up new hobbies to fill her time. Eliza learned to play the guitar (still a work in progress) and she also decided to train for a marathon. School had always been important to her and she continued to work hard at that as well. Still, she felt as though she was still waiting and being prepared for something (or someone) to happen.
There was also a prince named Jethro who was going to the same school as Eliza. They didn't know each other but eventually found out they had a few friends in common. Jethro was studying hard in school and taking tons (and tons and tons) of girls on dates. Despite his valiant efforts, none of the girls he was meeting were making the cut. As the semester went on, Jethro was becoming more and more discouraged with the opposite sex.
One late night in November, Eliza was walking home from the library where she had just spent the majority of the day studying for her child development class. She decided to cut through the gyms to get to the other side of campus in order to avoid the frigid weather that awaited her. There were several recreational basketball games going on and Eliza couldn't help but sneak a peak at who was playing. Turns out, her good friend Lance and his roommates happened to be slaughtering a fellow team on the court closest to the door Eliza walked into.
Eliza recognized most of Lance's team and talked to each of them as they took their turn out of the game. Jethro was one of the roommates Eliza recognized from a pick-up basketball game they had played together at the park earlier in the semester. They talked a bit but split their separate ways after the game was over. A week or so later, Lance asked Eliza if she would ever go on a date with Jethro. She responded by saying that of course she would, but he would have to come get her number himself.
The following Sunday, Jethro some-what resistantly meandered over to Eliza's apartment to get her number. In a horribly awkward sequence, he managed to retrieve her digits with a promise that he would eventually call her to take her out. Eliza would later find out that she would be his last ditch effort when it came to dating. If Jethro didn't get a second date out of his encounter with Eliza, he would be giving up on the whole process indefinitely.
They ended up playing phone tag a bit the next day but eventually, Jethro asked Eliza on a date for the Wednesday before Thanksgiving break. He didn't tell her what they would be doing. Instead, he directed her to bring her "architectual skills and creative skills" along. Eliza had her doubts about Jethro, but she had to admit, she was extremely intrigued and excited for their date.
Wednesday night arrived and Eliza barely remembered she had a date that evening. She had been studying hard that day and wasn't looking forward to having to pull out the first date script and having to pretend that all of her date's jokes were funny. Her suspicions about Jethro were added to when she answered the door. Eliza chuckled to herself when she looked up and down at her date and determined that he was definitely the "socks with sandals type".
Jethro decided to take Eliza to a comedy club show. They laughed the whole time and Eliza was beginning to eat her earlier thoughts and words. Turns out, her date wasn't at all what she had suspected and to her surprise, she was actually having a great time. Jethro scored lots of brownie points for the next part of the date. He informed Eliza that they would next be making sailboats to float down the creek out of bars of soap. He also told her that their team name would be The Pirates and he had costumes waiting for them back at his apartment.
Eliza and Jethro slipped on their eye patches, their hats with skulls and crossbones and put fake gold coins for booty into their pockets. They hollowed out the center of the bar of soap to make it float and made a flag with toothpicks and a piece of paper towel to stick into the middle of it. They were competing with two other couples to see whose boat would sail the fastest in the water. Eliza, Jethro and the other couples drove down to the river to administer the competition.
Naturally, the boat Eliza and Jethro made turned into a submarine and was too fast for anybody to catch. It was determined by everybody that their boat had won the race. They all went back to Jethro's apartment to get warm after sailing the ships. In the car, Eliza was informed by his friend that Jethro was very talented and could play the guitar, the piano and the ukelele. She demanded that he give her a private concert as soon as they got back.
Jethro made her a deal. He would play her a song, but only if Eliza played him one also. She reluctantly agreed. He proceeded to play her a blues song and it was written all over her face that she was impressed. It was Eliza's turn next. It took her a good twenty minutes to build up her confidence, but she eventually plucked out a verse or two of a simple song before she forgot the rest of the lyrics.
Jethro and Eliza's chemistry was really obvious and both were teased about how well their first date was going. However, it was nearing the end of the night and Eliza needed to go home to finish homework. They ended the date with an awkward, airy hug and quick quip about hanging out together over the break since they would both be in town.
Eliza walked into her apartment with a tiny smile on her face and she knew in that moment that she was in trouble.




Long story short, Eliza's amazing boyfriend surprised her when he showed up on her doorstep this weekend. They are very much in love. And they're playing for keeps.


Saturday, January 8, 2011

Here Comes the Sun...doo doo doo doo

I haven't made any lists lately. I'm falling behind on my quota!


10 Reasons Why This Semester Could Totally Suck

10. We're not doing apartment dinners anymore so pretty much all I've eaten is frosted flakes and blueberry bagels.
9. I missed the first day of school so I already feel loads behind. The bookstore didn't have one of the textbooks I need to get either. I need it for an assignment due Monday.
8. All of my classes are extremely time consuming. Even my Old Testament class requires a minimum of 4 hours outside of class for studying and preparation.
7. My computer had it's memory temporarily erased. No pictures. No itunes. No old assignments that I could possible recycle and reuse for future assignments.
6. Julianne and Kileigh are both off-track which means there will be less laughing, less crying and less people to always be there for me.
5. My sister is super sick all the time and could really use a big sister to take care of her. I won't see her until February though.
4. It's wintertime in Rexburg. Do you like -20 degree mornings? I don't. Especially when I have to train for a marathon in them.
3. I've been in my ward so long, I don't have much of a desire to get out there and be social anymore... I know everybody. Everybody knows me.
2. I have ZERO money. I decided to get on fast-track (which means I'll be going to school every semester instead of just 2 out of the 3). There are no jobs in the 'Burg.
1. I am here. My super hot, adorable boyfriend is in Utah. I don't like it.


10 Reasons Why This Semester Could Totally Rock

10. My marathon is in 8 days!!!! I'm so excited! It would be way cool if I didn't die trying to finish it.
9. I am starting P90X the week after my marathon. I'm pretty much going to be on the L.G. N. diet for the next 6 months. I'll take before and after pictures.
8. I'm going home in February for a few days! And i'm bringing my super hot, adorable boyfriend with me!
7. My new roommate seems super sweet and she's an RM. I bet I can learn a lot from her.
6. I have a feeling my calling is going to be a fun one. Like a compassionate service leader or a birthday specialist.
5. 4 of my old roommates stayed with me and I love them all! They always have smiles on their faces and there is hardly any drama.
4. Utah and Rexburg are only 4 hours apart. I'll get to see my sweetie at least a couple weekends a month and it'll give me something to look forward to.
3. Having no social life will really help me to focus on school and achieve all of my spiritual goals.
2. I might just have time to play rec sports!
1. It's going to rock because I am going to CHOOSE to make it awesome.



Also, you should know that Paul McCartney just struck a deal and The Beatles are now on itunes. Thus the title of this post.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

This is why I don't listen to the radio.

My ipod died on the way to Rexburg from Utah.

I'd catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I'd jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya

I would go through all this pain,
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes, I would die for ya
But you won't do the same


Wow, Bruno. Dramatic and overly graphic much?